Decreasing Stress, Encouragement, Karate, Motivational

Be More Positive About Yourself

There is one person from whom you can never disengage. You have to put up with their mood, personality, and conflicts. But, you get to share in their triumphs, successes and joys. It is about time you started to embrace the good and let the bad go because this person is you!

People generally focus on the negative both in life and about themselves. Have you ever sat back and looked in the mirror and thought about how quickly the years have gone by? How many times have you wished you could exchange part of your life for someone else’s? It is human nature to want what others have, or to want to be like someone else. Today, however is the day to begin to embrace the joy of being you.

First, you must dispose of the negative thoughts and focus on what you do like about yourself. I have always liked the color of my eyes, for example. They are green and hold a special connection to my father and my son, who both have the exact same color eyes that I do. I like my capability to inspire others. I am happy with the ongoing success of my writing profession.

The laundry list of what I do not like used to take up a whole page. From my unreasonable fears and insecurities, to the fact that I cannot stop the aging process, to wishing I were different in a myriad of ways. But, then I realized that all of the negative energy spent on the things I dislike about myself was destructive, and that I should focus on positive energy instead and more of what I do like. Now, I cherish being me.

Embrace what you like about yourself. As soon as a negative self-criticism enters the picture, recognize it and change it. Or, look for the positive in it. I used to hate my thick thighs, until they became a powerful asset when I began practicing martial arts. My legs are the now the highlight in my kicking abilities and I no longer wish to have the long, slender legs that I once thought were so beautiful on other women.

I love all aspects of martial arts, but a couple of years ago I began working more on flexibility and kicking because I thought it would be a good self-improvement project! Many days during the week I still go outside and practice a few kicks. They always make me feel empowered, not because I can kick another person or even a bag, but because I can continually get better and stronger. As for my strong legs, I realized that…

we are all built the way that we are built for a reason.

The most confident people in the world are happy with who they are. They try to improve weaknesses. They  do not like every single thing about themselves (there is always room for improvement), but they like who they are, overall. They wake up in the morning positive, self-motivated, and ready for success. They smile. They take a moment to be grateful. They have friends and families whom they adore. There is nothing better than being around them because they are full of energy and positivity. They are the role models for finding joy within.

Rest assured that you can appreciate yourself more if you begin being a more positive person. People will be drawn to you because of who you are, and you will no longer feel the need to be so critical of yourself. Not every success is based on physical traits, for example. Think of some famous people in the world. They are not all  beautiful in the typical sense. Some have elevated to fame and the love of others because of acting, inventing, or singing. They do not focus on their appearance, but on their gifts and talents, because those are their most positive attributes. You have countless positive attributes!

Combine what you love to do with a more positive perspective of yourself. Others rarely see the same flaws in you that you do, but they hear your words and see your actions. This is the perfect place to build a better you. Start with what you say and what you do and do not allow yourself to get caught up in your negative opinions of yourself, which are probably far less noticeable by others than you realize.

Today, the joy of being you is ready to emerge. The fastest and simplest way to this joy is to turn your negativity around the moment you see it rear its ugly head. It is as effective as a magic wand! Wave the negative criticisms away, and be the joyous person you are meant to be.




The Martial Arts Woman book is now available. Purchase through my e-commerce store: or on Amazon:

This book shares the stories and insights of more than twenty-five women in the martial arts, and how they apply martial arts to their lives.

Andrea F. Harkins is a writer, motivator, life coach, martial artist, and public speaker. She was inducted into the USA Martial Arts Hall of Fame in July, 2017. Her book, The Martial Arts Woman, is now available at

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